What the hell happened?
I have no idea what happened and how it ended up this way. All i know is that this wasn’t what i thought would happen.
Beginnings. The year started off so brightly, amazingly even. So what the fuck happened to it all?
There are a few things i regret having done this year but I can’t imagine living life any differently. You take the good with the bad and live your life with the cards you’ve been dealt with. But still…….
I have no idea why but over this last few weeks every ugly thing that has happened this whole year seems to be resurfacing frequently in my mind and I cant, as much as I try, get any of it out of my mind. So yeah, I cover up with smiles and jokes, laughing it all off. But when alls said and done, I’m left thinking about everything that has happened and questioning it all.
Was it worth the heart involved?
The obstacles, the chemicals
Friendships. This year seems to have tested my concept of friendship. I have no idea how to define friendship at all anymore. All the lying, the backstabbing, the fake brothers everywhere. None of this happened in secondary school. Maybe i was lucky i guess. I guess its best I found out about who someone really is and how now everyone hates him, but he doesn’t even know it.
I’d rather be surrounded by a small group of friends who I know I can trust fully and whom I love, then be “well-known’ surrounded by fake people who couldnt give a damn about you. And to be honest, im too tired to keep on fighting. But I dont want to give it up.
There are these kids who have dreams.
There are these dreams that will grow.
Until they get so fucking big that they explode.
And what’s left in the smoke and the falling debris
Is grownups like them and losers like me.
I guess this whole year has kinda bummed me out. It started with so much promise but its ending as an unmitigated disaster.
Nothing movie like, nothing magic.
People just tired of fights, the constant battle
Trust. What the hell is trust nowadays? Secrets being given out for free, like nobodys’ goddamn business. No one seems to give a shit nowadays but how other people feels and will just go around telling anyone anything that they want to hear. FOR WHAT? To get closer to people who dont really care about you? It goes back to friendship and how we seem to be desecrating it these days.
I hope its just a passing thing, that by November all will be well and things will work out. But it only looks to be getting worse. But hey, chin up and we’ll drown a little slower right?
Right……
If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character…Would you slow down? Or speed up?
Hi. I am your worst nightmare! was shot at 7:11 AM